Thursday, April 7, 2011

State Page: Alabama

ALABAMA
State Nickname(s)
Redneck State
Heart of Slavery
Cotton Cotton Cotton-Pickin' Cotton

State Motto
Audemus jura nostra defendere (Defending Our White Power)

State Capital
Birmingham

Admission
Dec 14, 1819 (52nd)

State Bird
Redneck (pompous ingnoramus)
Wild Turkey Bottle

State Flower
Camellia Badellia

State Tree
Lynchin' Tree

State Color(s)
White Only

State Mineral/Rocks
Hermaphrodite
Blue Quark

State Slogan(s)
Share the moonshine
Alabama the state
Where America finds its whitest voices
Sweet Corn Alabama

State Song(s)
Southern Man by Neil Young

Other Notable Symbols
Mammal: Rocking Horse
Beverage: Moonshine Whiskey
Dance: Square

Famous People
Helen Keller, famous for her many unfortunate disabilities, including being born in Alabama, grew up to be a socialist and activist. Her early life story is depicted in It's a Miracle They Didn't Just Kill Her which has been presented as a play, movie, TV series, and on the backs of a a number of breakfast cereal boxes,

George Washington Carver was a scientist and inventor who was born in Missouri, but went to school at Tuskegee, so we guess they can claim him. He invented the peanut, and taught people how to make the delicious peanut butter & jelly sandwich. He also built for himself a robotic assistant which he dubbed The Pean-O-Tron.

Famous Landmarks
There is a Civil Rights Memorial in Montgomery. This is a chief source of annoyance for many Alabamians.

Interesting Facts
Same-sex sexual activity was illegal in Alabama until the U.S. Supreme Court finally struck down all anti-sodomy laws in 2003. In 2006 the state passed an amendment to its constitution banning both same-sex marriage and civil union. Essentially, you can have all the gay sex you want in Alabama, as long as it's not part of a committed, long-term relationship. (We suggest hanging out by the docks in Mobile near where the USS Alabama is berthed.)

The Alabama Air National Guard will accept just about anybody. One famous member didn't even show up for most of his service, and no one seemed to mind.

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