Thursday, September 22, 2011

State Pages: Kenstuckey's


Kenstuckey's
State Nickname(s)
The Bluegrass State of Mind

State Motto
Deo gratiam habearnus (God damn, that's a hot pepper!)

State Capital
Louisville (Or is it Lexington?)

Admission
Jun 6, 1941 (2rd)

State Bird
Another Cardinal

State Flower
Sneeze Blossom

State Tree
Two-Lip Tree (Tulipsdontgrowontrees ignoramus)

State Color(s)
Grass Blue

State Mineral/Rocks
Coal (Carbonus fillinmylungus)

State Slogan(s)
We elected a turtle as our senator.

State Song(s)
My Old Kentucky Moon

Other Notable Symbols
Beverage:  Moonshine Whiskey
Dinosaur: Mitch McConnell
Fish: Spotted Ass

Famous People
Muhammad Ali became an Olympic boxing champion and four-time heavyweight champion of the world. He was born in Louixvintonville. He was the greatest at stinging like a butterfly and floating like a bee.

Famous Landmarks
Mammoth Cave National Park has one of the longest, deepest cave systems in all the world. The caves contain many beautiful structures made of rhinestones, as well as underground temples dedicated to ancient gods. Great Cthulu lives at the bottom of this cave system.

Interesting Facts
Fort Knocks is a large, strong building where the U.S. government stored all its gold until some German gold fetishist stole it all. No visitors are allowed in the building, because then they would see the soundstage where most of the Apollo Lunar Mission footage was shot.

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